Yes, that’s what I said. Passing wind, whizzpopping, baffing, good old letting one rip.

fart

Vegans and vegetarians have a terrible reputation for noxious farts that could clear a room. It’s all those fermenting beans I hear you say.

 

Hmmm – as a new vegan I can clearly remember my prevegan farting habits and compare them with my vegan ones

And that’s nonsense – well, half nonsense.

 

I fart much much less than when I had rotting, decomposing dead animal in my belly – much much less

But jesus, I could clear a room in seconds. Even I want to leave the room as the varnish on the doors slowly melts and the glass bubbles.

What the hell happens to veg in the digestive system? With some clever engineering I am sure this could be a chemical weapon of mass destruction.

fart-wars

image from: http://www.ladyandthesweatshop.com/ancient-fart-wars/

I am mostly joking – the glass doesn’t bubble cos it gets blown out before it is really exposed to the noxious fumes

I did some research and discovered that actually vegan farts should be less offensive than meat eating ones because: science

However, the foods vegans eat that do create sulphide rich gas are cabbage, broccoli, onions, Brussel sprouts, peas, leeks and garlic. It’s the sulphides that burn your nostril hairs and cause small dogs to whimper around vegans.

So my problem may not be the lack of meat but the fact that I eat at least one of these dreaded suphide-monsters in pretty much every meal.

garlic-monster

image of a garlic monster from: http://blog.coghillcartooning.com/6410/gnarly-garlic-lowbrow-monster-food-vegetable-cartoon-character-sketch/

But of course these delightful vegetables that are the gifts that keep on giving are also some of the most protein dense vegetables too. So not eating them in a plantbased diet is not really a possibility.

Seems noxious whizzpops are part of the deal when deciding to eat a plantbased diet.

 

All I can say is that I am glad I have four dogs I can blame.

dav

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